The Dickens you say
John and Drew got their grades recently and they were good! Both guys made the Honor Roll as sophomores in predominately honors classes and they both made me very proud. I think that both of them realize the importance of hard work and enjoy making good grades. As their dad, closely observing each of their study habits, I assure you that it’s not unreasonable for me to encourage they aspire to the Principals List. They continue to impress me and I am proud of them. I am not satisfied with them, not in the least, I can’t allow myself.
This feeling has so many Freudian “angles” that Euclid could get confused. “When you are given much, much is expected. When you are given much more, much more is expected!” That’s how Luke 12:48 looks at it and it’s fair, don’t you think? If I talk too much about the “student” I was, it could have an adverse effect on the students I expect them to be. A good “student” gives himself the best chance to succeed. Take math for instance, both boys have high B low A averages in Geometry and Algebra II. Even though, looking back, I would have been thrilled, I can’t be satisfied with them because I’d be selling them short! It is hard for me to keep a straight face when I say “ if you can make a 92 you can make a 94″ even though that’s the very attainable truth. I usually say such things to them in the car, at night, where they can’t see my face, and I can’t see theirs.
My maternal grandfather, John William Mills used to have a saying that I have always understood for it’s subtle wit, “wonder what happened to all those brilliant grandchildren?” I’m from witty people, if anything, on both sides. Usually what happened to those brilliant grandchildren is that the parents got “satisfied” way too easily. I believe one of the secrets of being a good daddy is not demanding that my kids adapt to me, but that I adapt to them, recognizing their strengths and encouraging them to maximize their gifts. When you’ve got hold of the reins, you’ve got to guide your subjects with a firm yet gentle hand, like a dance, always remembering to keep your own balance. As a parent, you can’t let those kids rest on their laurels, they’ll go to sleep! Giddy up! Talk with you soon.
When have you found yourself re-evaluating your expectations? Have your children surprised you when it comes to being satisfied?
